"And what more shall I say? For the time would fail me to tell of Gideon..." Hebrews 11:32
"So Gideon said to God, IF You will save Israel by my hand as You have said --- look I shall put a fleece of wool on the threshing floor; IF there is dew on the fleece only, and it is dry on all the ground, then I shall know that You will save Israel by my hand, as You have said." And it was so, when he rose early the next morning and squeezed the fleece together, he wrung the dew out of the fleece, a bowlful of water.
Then Gideon said to God, 'Do not be angry with me, but let me speak just once more; let me test, I pray, just once more with the fleece; let it now be dry only on the fleece, but on all the ground let there be dew." And God did so that night. It was dry on the fleece only, but there was dew on all the ground." Judges 6:36-40
Opening line: "IF You will save Israel by my hand as You have said..."
Gideon's trust level with the Lord was running on empty, here.
After God had approached Gideon and told him he was a valiant warrior and assured Gideon that He would be with him to conquer the enemy, Gideon doubted the Lord. (Judges 6:12-18)
Even after the Lord saved Gideon's hide from angry, Baal-worshipping townspeople, Gideon doubted the Lord. (Judges 6:27-31)
I can just see Gideon pacing back and forth asking, "If You're sure...are You sure, Lord? Really positive? Like...You're "sure" sure? Or SURE sure?"
There are moments in our lives when God asks us to take big steps of faith.
This was Gideon's moment.
You wonder if Gideon knew in his heart that the Lord was "sure" but was in denial about it. That - when he saw the fleece first wet with dew, then dry - Gid knew in his heart of hearts that the Lord was "sure" and didn't want to admit it. Maybe he wanted to test the Lord, to provoke Him to anger and go find someone else for the mission.
Gideon did not want to yield to God's will because he didn't trust the Lord enough to know God had made a way that Gideon couldn't see at the time.
He was too focused on his self rather than the bigger picture here.
Not THY will, Lord, but MY will. I can't see how Your will works, God. So my will is better.
Sometimes we allow our doubts, fears, and anxieties to creep in and speak louder than God's voice. We doubt God's sincerity that He will provide, that He will lead us, that He will protect us. We doubt His Word when He says He will give us a "future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:11
We doubt His voice when He speaks to us.
Just like with Gideon, no matter how many times the Lord "proves" Himself to us, we come up with more excuses. But God will always have a ready answer each time.
Lord, I'm not strong enough. I don't think I can do it.
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9
Lord, I don't know what Your will is. Life as a Christian is too hard. I see other people who aren't Christians that have an easier life than I do!
"Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect." Romans 12:2
Lord, I'm tired. I don't see an end in sight and would rather just give up.
"For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised." Hebrews 10:36
My friends, understand this: the Lord will guide us. We don't need an entire map to see the journey because HE IS WITH US EVERY STEP OF THE WAY. He will illuminate our path enough to see the next step so that our dependance is placed on HIM only and not ourselves. (Psalm 119:105)
When Jesus was in the garden praying before having to be hung on the cross, He pleaded: "Abba Father, all things are possible for You. Take this cup away from Me..." Mark 13:46
But He doesn't leave it there.
"NEVERTHELESS, NOT WHAT I WILL, BUT WHAT YOU WILL." Mark 14:36
Nothing is wrong in asking for confirmation from the Lord, BUT when doubts and second-guessing cloud our minds, we need to release our own will and say to the Lord, "Not what I will but what You will."
When you are confused when God speaks to you...
Not what I will but what You will.
When you don't want to do it...
Not what I will but what You will, Lord.
When you're resisting...
Not what I will.
"Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven." Matthew 6:10
Gideon received SO MUCH patience from the Lord. How much more so do we receive patience from our heavenly Father? How much MORE? When Gideon received TWO confirmations from the Lord, he had no more excuses. Because in his words, "Then I shall know that You will save Israel by my hand, as You have said...", and he got his answer.
And he learned it was not by his will...but the Lord's.
"Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God! Let Your good Spirit lead me on level ground!" Psalm 143:10
~ Kissy Black